Hospice

My good friend Debra's mom was moved from the hospital that she has been unsuccessfully battling cancer with over the past month to a hospice yesterday evening. It is a new situation for me to comprehend because all of the people that I have known that have died have all been sudden deaths (2 car accidents and one in the War in Iraq). The idea that she could live anywhere from one more week to one more month is strange. When do I spend the money to go up and visit...now, when she's alive, or after, to attend the memorial, funeral and comfort my friend? It seems sad that I would choose to not go up and see her, but at the same time I want to be able to comfort Debra after her mom's passing. Also, I guess I'm leaning towards the memorial/funeral because my other close friends will be attending it and it will be a time of grief/closure for all of us. I hand wrote her a note, and for electronic back-up purposes, I'm posting it here. It is weird having to say goodbye to someone in a letter, and I never quite feel sufficient at writing, so here is what I got, from my heart:

Dear Bonnie,
It is hard for me to put into words/express how much everything you've done for me over the years means to me. If I could be there in person to give you a final farewell hug, I definitely would be. Know that I will be coming up to be there for Debra when the Lord calls you home. I can't imagine how torn you are with wanting to stay here on earth for Debra, but at the same time have put in more than your share of suffering and are ready to go home. Know that I have been praying for your strength as well as Debra's in this incredibly challenging time.
My memories take me back to when I first became good friends with Debra, when you lived on Satinwood Dr. and the day I got my first speeding ticket. You welcomed me into your home and helped calm me down, as well as helped me to figure out how and what to tell my Dad. Then, you allowed me to serve my 30 hours of community service by doing like 3 hours of library "work". That was sweet.
I think back to all of the coaching/counsel you gave me with all of my math issues, and how supportive and kind you were to me through a tough time of my parents divorcing.
I look back fondly upon the time when we cleaned/organized/decorated Debra's room in the house on Mossy Ct. for her return from Austrailia (was it?)...(some distant land).
Lots of my memories that involve Debra also include you, because being the amazing mom and person that you are, you were always there for her. That is one characteristic that I will not forget about you, how selfless, self-sacrificing, giving, and the overall servant-heart that you have. You have been there for me numerous times, and I know that you have touched the lives of SO MANY others in the professions that you have held.
These memories and the person you are will not be forgotten, and I just wanted to let you know of these truths, and thank you for them all.
You have been a special piece of my life's puzzle and I thank God for this, and for you.
This is not goodbye forever, just until the Lord decides to call me Home as well, and we will be praising the same Almighty Father whom is sovereign and knows exactly what He is doing. A God that can use pain and suffering for His perfect plan and for His glory. A God whom Himself suffered; bled and died on a cross so that we could be with HIm for eternity. He is risen, and so will we in Him, with perfect, heavenly bodies. I can not wait!! Praise the Lord that we have hope! That Jesus, come to Earth has conquered death.
So many times, Bonnie, you were like a second mother to me, and I will be forever grateful for all of the love, concern and care that you have shown me.
Take care in this winter of your life. Know that "for every season there is a time for every matter under Heaven" (Ecclesiastes 3:1), and that you are not alone.
I send my love in this envelope to you.
In Christ,
Jess